Tuesday, October 31, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “The Bible was not given to increase our knowledge but to change our lives.” (Rick Warren)
My own people laugh at me. All day long they sing their mocking songs. He has filled me with bitterness. He has given me a cup of deep sorrow to drink. He has made me grind my teeth in gravel. He has rolled me in the dust. Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the LORD is lost!”
The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:
The unfailing love of the LORD never ends! By his mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each day. I say to myself, “The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”
Lamentations 3:14-23 NLT
About five years ago I got a hold of these verses of Scripture and I came to realize that they defined my life, how it was, and what happened. Jeremiah was writing about the nation of Israel, but when I read it I could see myself when I was in the death grips of addictions. It all started with “grind my teeth in gravel.” That reminded me of a time in the parking lot of a bar on the Missouri-Arkansas state line when things were not going my way. I have been rolled in the dirt and dust many times either by my own force or somebody else’s. I remember times when peace was stripped away and even my sleep left me because of thoughts that rolled over and over in my mind about the way I was living. I have seen money and many forms of material and spiritual prosperity just slip away with no resistance. Months of my life have been spent as a homeless person bumming a bed here or there, or sleeping where I could. Jeremiah went on to say about the nation of Israel that he would never forget that awful time, and so it is in my life, I cannot forget regardless of how much I wish it was not there. But then………”the unfailing love of God.” And brand new mercy that is extended to me each day by faith in Jesus Christ and the finished work of the cross. God’s love is one-way and it just keeps a coming. Even when I screw up, it just keeps a coming. About five years ago in my recovery from alcoholism and addictions I got this deep in my spirit that I will never run out of mercy from God. I came to know that I never have to drink or use again because of the hope I find new each morning. What a promise……..God is doing for me what I could not do for myself……………………JRE
“Perhaps we are brokenhearted because of bitter suffering in our family. Maybe our once-good reputation has been ruined and now we are ashamed. Our life has been taken captive and destroyed before the watchful eyes of friends and foes alike………….turning our lives over to God includes giving him our pain and suffering. In our times of grief and shame we can hope, knowing that God will help us overcome the problems we face. God is strong enough to lift our burdens and loving enough to mend our broken heart.” THE LIFE RECOVERY BIBLE, page 943
Brand new mercy
Thought for the day: “The Bible was not given to increase our knowledge but to change our lives.” (Rick Warren)
My own people laugh at me. All day long they sing their mocking songs. He has filled me with bitterness. He has given me a cup of deep sorrow to drink. He has made me grind my teeth in gravel. He has rolled me in the dust. Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the LORD is lost!”
The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:
The unfailing love of the LORD never ends! By his mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each day. I say to myself, “The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”
Lamentations 3:14-23 NLT
About five years ago I got a hold of these verses of Scripture and I came to realize that they defined my life, how it was, and what happened. Jeremiah was writing about the nation of Israel, but when I read it I could see myself when I was in the death grips of addictions. It all started with “grind my teeth in gravel.” That reminded me of a time in the parking lot of a bar on the Missouri-Arkansas state line when things were not going my way. I have been rolled in the dirt and dust many times either by my own force or somebody else’s. I remember times when peace was stripped away and even my sleep left me because of thoughts that rolled over and over in my mind about the way I was living. I have seen money and many forms of material and spiritual prosperity just slip away with no resistance. Months of my life have been spent as a homeless person bumming a bed here or there, or sleeping where I could. Jeremiah went on to say about the nation of Israel that he would never forget that awful time, and so it is in my life, I cannot forget regardless of how much I wish it was not there. But then………”the unfailing love of God.” And brand new mercy that is extended to me each day by faith in Jesus Christ and the finished work of the cross. God’s love is one-way and it just keeps a coming. Even when I screw up, it just keeps a coming. About five years ago in my recovery from alcoholism and addictions I got this deep in my spirit that I will never run out of mercy from God. I came to know that I never have to drink or use again because of the hope I find new each morning. What a promise……..God is doing for me what I could not do for myself……………………JRE
“Perhaps we are brokenhearted because of bitter suffering in our family. Maybe our once-good reputation has been ruined and now we are ashamed. Our life has been taken captive and destroyed before the watchful eyes of friends and foes alike………….turning our lives over to God includes giving him our pain and suffering. In our times of grief and shame we can hope, knowing that God will help us overcome the problems we face. God is strong enough to lift our burdens and loving enough to mend our broken heart.” THE LIFE RECOVERY BIBLE, page 943
Monday, October 30, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Prayer is not overcoming God’s reluctance; it is laying hold of His highest willingness.” (Richard C. Trench)
“It does not depend on man’s desire or effort, but on God’s mercy. For the Scripture says to Pharaoh: ‘I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.’ Therefore God has mercy on whom he wants to have mercy, and he hardens whom he wants to harden.”
Romans 9:16-18 NIV
How can a loving God harden some hearts and soften others? God does not change, God is the same today, yesterday, and forever, so why are some people affected one way and others another way? God doesn’t change, so the answer must be found in us. Finis Dake and his commentaries on the Bible have opened my eyes to the fact that God is, and is unchangeable. Many times in my prayer I try and get God to change something or maybe I try and get God to see something more my way. I am realizing that this form of prayer is like talking to the sun. Bill Wilson, one of the co-founders of AA said it over and over, “Thy will, not mine, be done.” For years on occasions I would attend churches, go to various AA meeting, group therapies, and other types of activities that could have had a beneficial affect on my life, and I would come away thinking, this is not going to work, they are asking too much of me, I can never submit to God this way, and on and on. As a result my heart became hardened to God and these various programs of recovery. God actually hardened my heart, that’ right, a loving God hardened my heart, this is because God did not change. Finis Dake uses the concept of wax and clay sitting out in the sun on a hot day. The wax will melt, and the clay will dry and become harder. It was the same sun that melted one and hardened the other. When I came to realize that God works the same way in my life, I knew that in order to be molded so as to be of service to God, I had to change the substance of my heart. I had to stop thinking only of myself, and start thinking of others. This changes ones heart, and allows God to soften and mold the person. God is doing for me what I could not do for myself. Share with me what Finis Dake had to say about these verses of Scripture………………………JRE
“God hardens on the same grounds of showing mercy. If men will accept mercy He will give it to them. If they will not, thus hardening themselves He is only just and righteous in judging them. Men are privileged to humble themselves and seek mercy or exalt themselves and refuse mercy. Mercy is the effect of a right attitude, and hardening is the effect of stubbornness or the wrong attitude toward God. It is like the clay and the wax in the sun. The same sunshine hardens one and softens the other. The responsibility is with the materials, not with the sun. Men are more responsible than these materials, for they have wills to make proper choices. The only sense in which God hardened Pharaoh was in giving him the occasion to harden his own heart of obey. Such is the choice all men have to make daily (2 Cor. 2:15-17).”
THE DAKE BIBLE, page 168
“Mercy is the effect of a right attitude.”…….that’s the bottom line…….JRE
The sun, the wax, and the clay
Thought for the day: “Prayer is not overcoming God’s reluctance; it is laying hold of His highest willingness.” (Richard C. Trench)
“It does not depend on man’s desire or effort, but on God’s mercy. For the Scripture says to Pharaoh: ‘I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.’ Therefore God has mercy on whom he wants to have mercy, and he hardens whom he wants to harden.”
Romans 9:16-18 NIV
How can a loving God harden some hearts and soften others? God does not change, God is the same today, yesterday, and forever, so why are some people affected one way and others another way? God doesn’t change, so the answer must be found in us. Finis Dake and his commentaries on the Bible have opened my eyes to the fact that God is, and is unchangeable. Many times in my prayer I try and get God to change something or maybe I try and get God to see something more my way. I am realizing that this form of prayer is like talking to the sun. Bill Wilson, one of the co-founders of AA said it over and over, “Thy will, not mine, be done.” For years on occasions I would attend churches, go to various AA meeting, group therapies, and other types of activities that could have had a beneficial affect on my life, and I would come away thinking, this is not going to work, they are asking too much of me, I can never submit to God this way, and on and on. As a result my heart became hardened to God and these various programs of recovery. God actually hardened my heart, that’ right, a loving God hardened my heart, this is because God did not change. Finis Dake uses the concept of wax and clay sitting out in the sun on a hot day. The wax will melt, and the clay will dry and become harder. It was the same sun that melted one and hardened the other. When I came to realize that God works the same way in my life, I knew that in order to be molded so as to be of service to God, I had to change the substance of my heart. I had to stop thinking only of myself, and start thinking of others. This changes ones heart, and allows God to soften and mold the person. God is doing for me what I could not do for myself. Share with me what Finis Dake had to say about these verses of Scripture………………………JRE
“God hardens on the same grounds of showing mercy. If men will accept mercy He will give it to them. If they will not, thus hardening themselves He is only just and righteous in judging them. Men are privileged to humble themselves and seek mercy or exalt themselves and refuse mercy. Mercy is the effect of a right attitude, and hardening is the effect of stubbornness or the wrong attitude toward God. It is like the clay and the wax in the sun. The same sunshine hardens one and softens the other. The responsibility is with the materials, not with the sun. Men are more responsible than these materials, for they have wills to make proper choices. The only sense in which God hardened Pharaoh was in giving him the occasion to harden his own heart of obey. Such is the choice all men have to make daily (2 Cor. 2:15-17).”
THE DAKE BIBLE, page 168
“Mercy is the effect of a right attitude.”…….that’s the bottom line…….JRE
Thursday, October 26, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day
“Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days, when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when your out of options, when the pain is great, and you turn to God alone. It is during suffering that we learn to pray our most authentic, heartfelt, honest-to-God prayers. When we’re in pain, we don’t have the energy for superficial prayers.”
Rick Warren
“With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you.” (2 Peter 3:8-9 NIV)
I haven’t seen the sun shine for a couple of days. We really need the moisture so I am not complaining about the clouds and wet weather. It’s just that when I get stuck in the house sometimes my thoughts will turn inward and I can have a tendency to try and enjoy a little self-pity. As I mature as a Christian and continue to work a program of recovery through the 12 steps of AA, I realize that self-pity must be recognized, dealt with, and put in it’s proper place, the trash can of my mind. I must then on a regular basis through self-inventory, take the trash out and dispose of it properly. Gloomy inward reflections can be deadly to the alcoholic or addict. They must be dealt with quickly. Some of the ways I have learned to deal with self-pity are by reaching out to someone else. Not as a source of support for myself, but reaching out as a support for someone else. I also have learned to reflect on my blessings. God has blessed all of us abundantly, over and over again in our lives. I am amazed how a small cloud can block out the entire sun and make everything shady. But you know something? The sun is still shinning even when we can’t see it. God is the same way in our lives, at a low point or when our gloomy thoughts are directed inward, God’s love and grace are still shinning. At times the outside world might seem a bit dark and cloudy, but the real light can be found on the inside of us, as we think of God and all the many things that God has done for us that we could not do for ourselves. Let it rain, I’ll just turn on more lights on the inside……………..JRE
Here is a joke from the AA Grapevine, May 2000. Share this with me…….
When a woman called the local police station to report that she found a drunk in her cellar, the police sergeant advised, “Make a trail of drinks from the basement to the yard and wait for the drunk to follow them outside.” A little while later the woman called back: “I did what you told me. Now I’ve got two drunks in my cellar.”
Clouds
Thought for the day
“Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days, when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when your out of options, when the pain is great, and you turn to God alone. It is during suffering that we learn to pray our most authentic, heartfelt, honest-to-God prayers. When we’re in pain, we don’t have the energy for superficial prayers.”
Rick Warren
“With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you.” (2 Peter 3:8-9 NIV)
I haven’t seen the sun shine for a couple of days. We really need the moisture so I am not complaining about the clouds and wet weather. It’s just that when I get stuck in the house sometimes my thoughts will turn inward and I can have a tendency to try and enjoy a little self-pity. As I mature as a Christian and continue to work a program of recovery through the 12 steps of AA, I realize that self-pity must be recognized, dealt with, and put in it’s proper place, the trash can of my mind. I must then on a regular basis through self-inventory, take the trash out and dispose of it properly. Gloomy inward reflections can be deadly to the alcoholic or addict. They must be dealt with quickly. Some of the ways I have learned to deal with self-pity are by reaching out to someone else. Not as a source of support for myself, but reaching out as a support for someone else. I also have learned to reflect on my blessings. God has blessed all of us abundantly, over and over again in our lives. I am amazed how a small cloud can block out the entire sun and make everything shady. But you know something? The sun is still shinning even when we can’t see it. God is the same way in our lives, at a low point or when our gloomy thoughts are directed inward, God’s love and grace are still shinning. At times the outside world might seem a bit dark and cloudy, but the real light can be found on the inside of us, as we think of God and all the many things that God has done for us that we could not do for ourselves. Let it rain, I’ll just turn on more lights on the inside……………..JRE
Here is a joke from the AA Grapevine, May 2000. Share this with me…….
When a woman called the local police station to report that she found a drunk in her cellar, the police sergeant advised, “Make a trail of drinks from the basement to the yard and wait for the drunk to follow them outside.” A little while later the woman called back: “I did what you told me. Now I’ve got two drunks in my cellar.”
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Lord, what do you want me to do? “
Saul of Tarsus
So Paul standing before the Council, addressed them as follows: “Men of Athens, I notice that you are very religious, for as I was walking along I saw your many alters. And one of them had this inscription on it, ‘To an Unknown God.’ You have been worshiping him without knowing who he is, and now I wish to tell you about him.
“He is the God who made the world and everything in it. Since he is Lord of heaven and earth, he doesn’t live in man-made temples, and human hands can’t serve his needs, for he has no needs. He himself gives life and breath to everything, and he satisfies every need there is.” (Acts 17:22-25 NLT)
There was a time in my life when I had an Unknown God. When I went to Vietnam in 1967 I considered myself an atheist. Actually I probably was more of an agnostic but I considered myself as atheist. Simply put, an atheist says, “There is no God,” and an agnostic says, “I don’t know.” At that time in my life I did not have enough facts or information to make an accurate decision and my ego led me to tell others, as if I had that information, that there was no God. I remember that right before I left for Vietnam that my mother gave me a five dollar gold piece to carry with me as a good luck charm. She did that because I did not believe in God. My mama no doubt had some how prayed over that coin. I did carry it with me everywhere I went in Nam. As I think back over that time of my life this day, I realize that that possibly could have been the start of faith working in my life. I remember the first firefight we got into. It was in December of 1967, it was night and we had set up a night ambush. It had some how it got tripped, and all of a sudden it got loud, very loud. There were M-16 rounds flying everywhere and the night was lit up with red tracers. There were claymore mines going off, and grenades being thrown. Within minutes we had artillery support and major explosions were happening right in front of us. To this day I remember the first words out of my mouth the first few seconds of that firefight. They were, “Jesus Christ.” I don’t know if I was cussing, crying, or spiritually calling for a Savior? All I remember is saying those words. When I came back to the States in June of 1968, something had changed in my spirit. I believed in something, but did not know what it was. It was an Unknown God. During the late sixties and early seventies I fooled around with psychedelic drugs, yoga, and Hinduism. For me it was still an Unknown God in my life. When I first got introduced to AA in 1974 and in my various incarcerations and substance treatments for the next nine years, I believed in an Unknown God. In 1983 when I was doing time again for another DWI I got a hold of a Bible and through faith in, and the grace of a loving God, I had the unknown God in my life defined to my understanding. I remember the first time I read about the apostle Paul in Athens and about the altar with the inscription “To the Unknown God.” I connected to those Greeks, and I also connected to Paul’s explanation of who that God is. Today I know that I know, and through times of prayer, reading the Word, and fellowship with other believers, I grow closer and closer to my God who reveals Himself more each day of my life. I don’t want to go back to the way it was, God has done for me what I could not do for myself…………JRE
“Even though God may be unknown to us, he is near and willing to reveal himself. God has promised that ‘if you look for me in earnest, you will find me” (Jeremiah 29:13). Turning over our will involves accepting god as he is instead of insisting on creating him in our own image. When we seek God with an open heart and mind, we will find him.” THE LIFE RECOVERY BIBLE, page 1323
The Unknown God
Thought for the day: “Lord, what do you want me to do? “
Saul of Tarsus
So Paul standing before the Council, addressed them as follows: “Men of Athens, I notice that you are very religious, for as I was walking along I saw your many alters. And one of them had this inscription on it, ‘To an Unknown God.’ You have been worshiping him without knowing who he is, and now I wish to tell you about him.
“He is the God who made the world and everything in it. Since he is Lord of heaven and earth, he doesn’t live in man-made temples, and human hands can’t serve his needs, for he has no needs. He himself gives life and breath to everything, and he satisfies every need there is.” (Acts 17:22-25 NLT)
There was a time in my life when I had an Unknown God. When I went to Vietnam in 1967 I considered myself an atheist. Actually I probably was more of an agnostic but I considered myself as atheist. Simply put, an atheist says, “There is no God,” and an agnostic says, “I don’t know.” At that time in my life I did not have enough facts or information to make an accurate decision and my ego led me to tell others, as if I had that information, that there was no God. I remember that right before I left for Vietnam that my mother gave me a five dollar gold piece to carry with me as a good luck charm. She did that because I did not believe in God. My mama no doubt had some how prayed over that coin. I did carry it with me everywhere I went in Nam. As I think back over that time of my life this day, I realize that that possibly could have been the start of faith working in my life. I remember the first firefight we got into. It was in December of 1967, it was night and we had set up a night ambush. It had some how it got tripped, and all of a sudden it got loud, very loud. There were M-16 rounds flying everywhere and the night was lit up with red tracers. There were claymore mines going off, and grenades being thrown. Within minutes we had artillery support and major explosions were happening right in front of us. To this day I remember the first words out of my mouth the first few seconds of that firefight. They were, “Jesus Christ.” I don’t know if I was cussing, crying, or spiritually calling for a Savior? All I remember is saying those words. When I came back to the States in June of 1968, something had changed in my spirit. I believed in something, but did not know what it was. It was an Unknown God. During the late sixties and early seventies I fooled around with psychedelic drugs, yoga, and Hinduism. For me it was still an Unknown God in my life. When I first got introduced to AA in 1974 and in my various incarcerations and substance treatments for the next nine years, I believed in an Unknown God. In 1983 when I was doing time again for another DWI I got a hold of a Bible and through faith in, and the grace of a loving God, I had the unknown God in my life defined to my understanding. I remember the first time I read about the apostle Paul in Athens and about the altar with the inscription “To the Unknown God.” I connected to those Greeks, and I also connected to Paul’s explanation of who that God is. Today I know that I know, and through times of prayer, reading the Word, and fellowship with other believers, I grow closer and closer to my God who reveals Himself more each day of my life. I don’t want to go back to the way it was, God has done for me what I could not do for myself…………JRE
“Even though God may be unknown to us, he is near and willing to reveal himself. God has promised that ‘if you look for me in earnest, you will find me” (Jeremiah 29:13). Turning over our will involves accepting god as he is instead of insisting on creating him in our own image. When we seek God with an open heart and mind, we will find him.” THE LIFE RECOVERY BIBLE, page 1323
Monday, October 23, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “You’ll never know that God is all you need until God is all you’ve got.” (Rick Warren)
“For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.”
(Romans 5:6 KJV)
The apostle Paul in writing to the Church at Rome referred to the ungodly. As I study the Book of Romans using the Dake Bible, I read where the Jews divided men into four classes. Share this with me.
The just who said: What is mine is mine; what is thine is thine.
The accommodating who said: What is mine is thine; what is thine is mine.
The pious who said: What is mine is thine; what is thine let it be thine.
The ungodly who said: What is mine is mine; what is thine shall be mine.
As I sit and read this I wonder what class I am in? I can see that in my life I have been in all four classes, and from time to time drift from one class to another. I definitely can relate to the ungodly when I look back over my life to the times of selfishness and self-centeredness that drove me through many years of alcoholism and addictions. I realize today that I have many amends to make to people who I don’t even know. I usually don’t think of myself as a thief, as a matter of fact in the lowest of my character defects I took pride in the fact that I was not a thief. But today I realize that in that thought, I have not been honest with myself. Many times in drunken stupors I have stolen things from other people. Somewhere around the age of eleven I realized that I could take things from people and not get caught. Of course in time I got caught and I remember at the age of twelve having to go to the police station in San Antonio Texas for a talk with the authorities and my parents. I think this slowed me down for a year or so, but when I was fourteen I remember shoplifting clothes at a department store in Kansas City. The next five years from time to time I would steal and in 1965 when I was drunk I got busted for trying to steal a reel-to-reel tape recorder out of an apartment. I got drafted into the Army right after that and my stealing was put on hold. After Vietnam and drugs entered into my life, I became laid back and possibly too lazy to steal. When I was in my thirties while drunk I would get the courage to steal. It was not planned, I never set out to be a thief. It’s just that when the opportunity came up, and I was not in my right mind, I would take things. I never considered myself a thief (a big self-lie) and always had a dislike for those who stole. In 1983 in the midst of one of my drunken rages, I started hanging around with a guy that I had met in jail. One night when we were drunk he asked me to drive him over to his brothers house to get some clothes. I agreed and away we went. His brother lived in an uptown apartment and there was a donut store on the corner. When he returned to the truck he told me he had robbed the store, so away we went. We got busted later that night and all night long they questioned me about the robbery. The next day they took me to Leeds Farm to serve out a ninety-day sentence. I never saw the other guy again. My life was at an extreme low point, and it was at this point that I got a hold of a Bible and started reading. I started in the New Testament and it wasn’t long before I came to believe that Jesus died for the ungodly. Why God would stoop to the lowest forms of humanity and lavish His love upon us I will never understand. But that’s happened, and that Love forever changed my life. I have had times of dishonesty in my life since then, but the Holy Spirit won’t allow me to get away with it freely.
I wanted to write this morning about the beautiful fall colors, and how when I went out to feed the wild birds, how as I looked toward the barn, I thought about the time fifty years ago when I broke my granny’s rain gauge. I was led to a larger confession, thanks for letting me share…………God is doing for me what I could not do for myself……JRE
AA Step Five: Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
The thief
Thought for the day: “You’ll never know that God is all you need until God is all you’ve got.” (Rick Warren)
“For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.”
(Romans 5:6 KJV)
The apostle Paul in writing to the Church at Rome referred to the ungodly. As I study the Book of Romans using the Dake Bible, I read where the Jews divided men into four classes. Share this with me.
The just who said: What is mine is mine; what is thine is thine.
The accommodating who said: What is mine is thine; what is thine is mine.
The pious who said: What is mine is thine; what is thine let it be thine.
The ungodly who said: What is mine is mine; what is thine shall be mine.
As I sit and read this I wonder what class I am in? I can see that in my life I have been in all four classes, and from time to time drift from one class to another. I definitely can relate to the ungodly when I look back over my life to the times of selfishness and self-centeredness that drove me through many years of alcoholism and addictions. I realize today that I have many amends to make to people who I don’t even know. I usually don’t think of myself as a thief, as a matter of fact in the lowest of my character defects I took pride in the fact that I was not a thief. But today I realize that in that thought, I have not been honest with myself. Many times in drunken stupors I have stolen things from other people. Somewhere around the age of eleven I realized that I could take things from people and not get caught. Of course in time I got caught and I remember at the age of twelve having to go to the police station in San Antonio Texas for a talk with the authorities and my parents. I think this slowed me down for a year or so, but when I was fourteen I remember shoplifting clothes at a department store in Kansas City. The next five years from time to time I would steal and in 1965 when I was drunk I got busted for trying to steal a reel-to-reel tape recorder out of an apartment. I got drafted into the Army right after that and my stealing was put on hold. After Vietnam and drugs entered into my life, I became laid back and possibly too lazy to steal. When I was in my thirties while drunk I would get the courage to steal. It was not planned, I never set out to be a thief. It’s just that when the opportunity came up, and I was not in my right mind, I would take things. I never considered myself a thief (a big self-lie) and always had a dislike for those who stole. In 1983 in the midst of one of my drunken rages, I started hanging around with a guy that I had met in jail. One night when we were drunk he asked me to drive him over to his brothers house to get some clothes. I agreed and away we went. His brother lived in an uptown apartment and there was a donut store on the corner. When he returned to the truck he told me he had robbed the store, so away we went. We got busted later that night and all night long they questioned me about the robbery. The next day they took me to Leeds Farm to serve out a ninety-day sentence. I never saw the other guy again. My life was at an extreme low point, and it was at this point that I got a hold of a Bible and started reading. I started in the New Testament and it wasn’t long before I came to believe that Jesus died for the ungodly. Why God would stoop to the lowest forms of humanity and lavish His love upon us I will never understand. But that’s happened, and that Love forever changed my life. I have had times of dishonesty in my life since then, but the Holy Spirit won’t allow me to get away with it freely.
I wanted to write this morning about the beautiful fall colors, and how when I went out to feed the wild birds, how as I looked toward the barn, I thought about the time fifty years ago when I broke my granny’s rain gauge. I was led to a larger confession, thanks for letting me share…………God is doing for me what I could not do for myself……JRE
AA Step Five: Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Pride is to character like the attic to the house, the highest part, and generally the most empty.” (John Gay)
If you are wise and understand God’s ways of life of steady goodness so that only good deeds will pour forth. And if you don’t brag about the good you do, then you will be truly wise! But if you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your hearts, don’t brag about being wise. That is the worst kind of lie. For Jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and motivated by the Devil. For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and every kind of evil.
But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no partiality and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of goodness. (James 3:13-18 NLT)
I was listening today to an old Chuck Swindoll radio program that I had recorded a few years back. Chuck said something that struck a note with me, he said, “If intellectual knowledge brought about peace, then our universities and colleges would be peaceful magnets for those who want peace.” He went on to say that instead they are places where many are protesting one idea, and trying to influence others in another idea. He said there are also many unhappy teachers and students who are endlessly searching and not finding what they are looking for. Chuck’s sermon was probably recorded in the seventies when our universities were scenes of protest, but today I still find it interesting that intellectual knowledge does not bring peace. As I study the Scriptures I realize that what I need is not always the knowledge that comes from knowing the word, but from Godly wisdom that is given through the gifts of the Holy Spirit as I read. There is a difference. If I know much of the historical events and can recite from memory names and genealogy, but fail to grasp what God had inspired in the writing, then I am missing the point, and will not be able to apply the Word of God to my life. I find that in my life, peace and serenity comes from understanding, and not always just knowing. Scripture that I have read many times before sometimes just comes alive when I slow down and read each word with my heart. Peace and wisdom can be a byproduct of patience and understanding. Thanks for letting me share, God continues to do for me what I could not do for myself…………….JRE
“Wisdom is essential to recovery. It must, however, be godly wisdom, not earthly wisdom. Earthly wisdom leads to selfishness and pride, invariably causing confusion and strife. True wisdom is based on the knowledge of God. It brings peace and leads to selfless living and faith that works; it never distinguishes between groups of people but treats everyone with respect and love. Godly wisdom allows us to admit our failures and rebuild our life from the ashes of defeat. It frees us from our destructive dependency; it helps us live for others and builds relationships that will support our recovery.” Life Recovery Bible, page 1516
Peacemakers will plant seeds of peace
Thought for the day: “Pride is to character like the attic to the house, the highest part, and generally the most empty.” (John Gay)
If you are wise and understand God’s ways of life of steady goodness so that only good deeds will pour forth. And if you don’t brag about the good you do, then you will be truly wise! But if you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your hearts, don’t brag about being wise. That is the worst kind of lie. For Jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and motivated by the Devil. For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and every kind of evil.
But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no partiality and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of goodness. (James 3:13-18 NLT)
I was listening today to an old Chuck Swindoll radio program that I had recorded a few years back. Chuck said something that struck a note with me, he said, “If intellectual knowledge brought about peace, then our universities and colleges would be peaceful magnets for those who want peace.” He went on to say that instead they are places where many are protesting one idea, and trying to influence others in another idea. He said there are also many unhappy teachers and students who are endlessly searching and not finding what they are looking for. Chuck’s sermon was probably recorded in the seventies when our universities were scenes of protest, but today I still find it interesting that intellectual knowledge does not bring peace. As I study the Scriptures I realize that what I need is not always the knowledge that comes from knowing the word, but from Godly wisdom that is given through the gifts of the Holy Spirit as I read. There is a difference. If I know much of the historical events and can recite from memory names and genealogy, but fail to grasp what God had inspired in the writing, then I am missing the point, and will not be able to apply the Word of God to my life. I find that in my life, peace and serenity comes from understanding, and not always just knowing. Scripture that I have read many times before sometimes just comes alive when I slow down and read each word with my heart. Peace and wisdom can be a byproduct of patience and understanding. Thanks for letting me share, God continues to do for me what I could not do for myself…………….JRE
“Wisdom is essential to recovery. It must, however, be godly wisdom, not earthly wisdom. Earthly wisdom leads to selfishness and pride, invariably causing confusion and strife. True wisdom is based on the knowledge of God. It brings peace and leads to selfless living and faith that works; it never distinguishes between groups of people but treats everyone with respect and love. Godly wisdom allows us to admit our failures and rebuild our life from the ashes of defeat. It frees us from our destructive dependency; it helps us live for others and builds relationships that will support our recovery.” Life Recovery Bible, page 1516
Thursday, October 19, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “There is no key to happiness, the door is always open.”
(Author unknown)
Words of Jesus recorded by Mark and found in the eleventh chapter verses 22-26. Share this with me…………………..JRE
Have faith in God.
For assuredly, I say to you whoever says to this mountain, “Be removed and cast into the sea,” and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says.
Therefore I say to you whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.
And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses.
But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.
(Mark 11:22-26 NKJ)
“Have faith in God.” This is really not what Mark recorded as the words of Jesus. In the English translation the word “in” was added for clarity. Jesus probably said “Have God faith,” or meaning have the faith of God. There is a difference. Several study Bibles I have also say the same thing, and Strong’s Definitions says that the word “in” was added later. It is really not of extreme importance, but it does change how Jesus said our faith should work. As believers we all should have faith in God, but having the faith of God does seem a bit more difficult. It is possible though, or Jesus would not have told us that we could have the faith of God. These verses demonstrate to us how to have the faith to have our prayers answered. Praying while having serious doubts that we are heard, and then doubting if our prayers will be answered, can become more of a wishing thing, and not real prayer. Tossing a coin in a fountain will bring the same results. Jesus makes it very clear, the process of getting answered prayer. We must see our need. The illustration that Jesus gave used a mountain that probably all that were standing by could see. Our need might not be as great as having a mountain removed, but we still need to recognize our need. Jesus then says to speak to it. Tell “it” what you want. In my opinion this should be more of a command, expecting the command to be obeyed. It starts in our eyes or our mind, and then goes to our tongue or word process, next the heart must totally believe and accept that what was asked will come about. Okay, that’s the process of praying the prayer of faith, but here’s the clincher. It’s forgiveness. The whole process of seeing, speaking, and believing, is hard enough, but now Jesus commands us to forgive others to top off the deal. We must forgive not just some, but anyone we have anything against. Having no doubt and forgiving all will move mountains. That is, the faith “of God.” There is no doubt in God and God has forgiven all. Alcoholism and drug addiction were a impassable mountain in my life. When I had a heart change and decided to live, I got a hold of this scripture and used it. I spoke to my addictions and commanded they be removed. I had no doubt that I could stay sober if I worked at it daily, so daily I rebuke addiction from my life. Working the steps has taught me about heart forgiveness, not just mind forgiveness. All of this scripture working together has brought about change in my life. I am so grateful that I have been given another chance to turn my life around, and that through the Scriptures God shows me daily how it works. God has done for me what I could not do for myself………………JRE
See, speak, believe, and forgive
Thought for the day: “There is no key to happiness, the door is always open.”
(Author unknown)
Words of Jesus recorded by Mark and found in the eleventh chapter verses 22-26. Share this with me…………………..JRE
Have faith in God.
For assuredly, I say to you whoever says to this mountain, “Be removed and cast into the sea,” and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says.
Therefore I say to you whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.
And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses.
But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.
(Mark 11:22-26 NKJ)
“Have faith in God.” This is really not what Mark recorded as the words of Jesus. In the English translation the word “in” was added for clarity. Jesus probably said “Have God faith,” or meaning have the faith of God. There is a difference. Several study Bibles I have also say the same thing, and Strong’s Definitions says that the word “in” was added later. It is really not of extreme importance, but it does change how Jesus said our faith should work. As believers we all should have faith in God, but having the faith of God does seem a bit more difficult. It is possible though, or Jesus would not have told us that we could have the faith of God. These verses demonstrate to us how to have the faith to have our prayers answered. Praying while having serious doubts that we are heard, and then doubting if our prayers will be answered, can become more of a wishing thing, and not real prayer. Tossing a coin in a fountain will bring the same results. Jesus makes it very clear, the process of getting answered prayer. We must see our need. The illustration that Jesus gave used a mountain that probably all that were standing by could see. Our need might not be as great as having a mountain removed, but we still need to recognize our need. Jesus then says to speak to it. Tell “it” what you want. In my opinion this should be more of a command, expecting the command to be obeyed. It starts in our eyes or our mind, and then goes to our tongue or word process, next the heart must totally believe and accept that what was asked will come about. Okay, that’s the process of praying the prayer of faith, but here’s the clincher. It’s forgiveness. The whole process of seeing, speaking, and believing, is hard enough, but now Jesus commands us to forgive others to top off the deal. We must forgive not just some, but anyone we have anything against. Having no doubt and forgiving all will move mountains. That is, the faith “of God.” There is no doubt in God and God has forgiven all. Alcoholism and drug addiction were a impassable mountain in my life. When I had a heart change and decided to live, I got a hold of this scripture and used it. I spoke to my addictions and commanded they be removed. I had no doubt that I could stay sober if I worked at it daily, so daily I rebuke addiction from my life. Working the steps has taught me about heart forgiveness, not just mind forgiveness. All of this scripture working together has brought about change in my life. I am so grateful that I have been given another chance to turn my life around, and that through the Scriptures God shows me daily how it works. God has done for me what I could not do for myself………………JRE
Monday, October 16, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “ I am so thankful that I didn’t get what I deserved, therefore I don’t have any right to whine when I don’t get what I want.” (Pastor Darrell Friend)
“And do you think O man, you who judge those practicing such things, and doing the same, that you will escape the judgment of God? Or do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and longsuffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?” (Romans 2:3-4 NKJ)
Saturday we had a Fall Fest in my hometown. There were booths all around the square, various rides, a climbing wall, antique tractors, custom trucks and tractors, various bands, and drama skits. I wanted to be there at 11am to watch the drama team from my church minister the Word of God in action. What a powerful ministry it is when to music, they act out life’s drama in an understandable message that conveys the need for God in our lives. Trained actors are able to deliver a thought provoking idea without ever speaking a word. Actions many times do speak louder than words. After the skits I moved around through the different booths visiting and just enjoying what was on display. It was during this time that I ran into Pastor Darrell Friend. He planted the church I attend some thirty years ago. I asked him about the quote I had heard him speak a few months ago. I understood what it meant, but wanted to get the wording correct. The idea that I didn’t get what I deserved is fuel for my gratitude in working my program of recovery. I learned some time ago that if I am not grateful that I am clean and sober, I soon relapse back to using. This morning in my study time I read these verses by the apostle Paul as he wrote to the church at Rome. Two thoughts came to my mind. First was the word forbearance, and second was that it is God’s goodness that leads me to repentance. Before I became a Christian, I thought that people got saved because of God’s wrath. A kind of fear thing, which drove people to their knees. And some might come to the Lord this way, but for me it was more of the fact that God still loved me after all I had done that was wrong and self-centered. This is called forbearance. God bearing with me all along, waiting for the opportunity to shower love on me. Share with me what the Dake Bible has to say about the word forbearance. “Forbearance, the Greek word is anoche, the self restraint of God whereby He tolerates sinners and permits them to live to be saved.” That thought right there just trips my spiritual trigger. As I sit here right now with an open heart, basking in God’s love, I am thankful I didn’t get what I deserved. Once again, God has done for me what I could not do for myself…………………JRE
“So it is necessary for all of us to accept whatever positive gifts we receive with a deep humility, always bearing in mind that our negative attitudes were first necessary as a means of reducing us to such a state that we would be ready for a gift of the positive ones via the conversion experience. Your (my…jre) own alcoholism and the immense deflation that finally resulted are indeed the foundation upon which your (my….jre) spiritual experience rests.” BILL W. …………….A letter dated 1964
Tripping my spiritual trigger
Thought for the day: “ I am so thankful that I didn’t get what I deserved, therefore I don’t have any right to whine when I don’t get what I want.” (Pastor Darrell Friend)
“And do you think O man, you who judge those practicing such things, and doing the same, that you will escape the judgment of God? Or do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and longsuffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?” (Romans 2:3-4 NKJ)
Saturday we had a Fall Fest in my hometown. There were booths all around the square, various rides, a climbing wall, antique tractors, custom trucks and tractors, various bands, and drama skits. I wanted to be there at 11am to watch the drama team from my church minister the Word of God in action. What a powerful ministry it is when to music, they act out life’s drama in an understandable message that conveys the need for God in our lives. Trained actors are able to deliver a thought provoking idea without ever speaking a word. Actions many times do speak louder than words. After the skits I moved around through the different booths visiting and just enjoying what was on display. It was during this time that I ran into Pastor Darrell Friend. He planted the church I attend some thirty years ago. I asked him about the quote I had heard him speak a few months ago. I understood what it meant, but wanted to get the wording correct. The idea that I didn’t get what I deserved is fuel for my gratitude in working my program of recovery. I learned some time ago that if I am not grateful that I am clean and sober, I soon relapse back to using. This morning in my study time I read these verses by the apostle Paul as he wrote to the church at Rome. Two thoughts came to my mind. First was the word forbearance, and second was that it is God’s goodness that leads me to repentance. Before I became a Christian, I thought that people got saved because of God’s wrath. A kind of fear thing, which drove people to their knees. And some might come to the Lord this way, but for me it was more of the fact that God still loved me after all I had done that was wrong and self-centered. This is called forbearance. God bearing with me all along, waiting for the opportunity to shower love on me. Share with me what the Dake Bible has to say about the word forbearance. “Forbearance, the Greek word is anoche, the self restraint of God whereby He tolerates sinners and permits them to live to be saved.” That thought right there just trips my spiritual trigger. As I sit here right now with an open heart, basking in God’s love, I am thankful I didn’t get what I deserved. Once again, God has done for me what I could not do for myself…………………JRE
“So it is necessary for all of us to accept whatever positive gifts we receive with a deep humility, always bearing in mind that our negative attitudes were first necessary as a means of reducing us to such a state that we would be ready for a gift of the positive ones via the conversion experience. Your (my…jre) own alcoholism and the immense deflation that finally resulted are indeed the foundation upon which your (my….jre) spiritual experience rests.” BILL W. …………….A letter dated 1964
Friday, October 13, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “True humility is not an abject, groveling, self-despising spirit. It is but a right estimate of ourselves as God sees us.” (Tryon Edwards)
“Be careful to obey all the commands I am giving you today. Then you will live and multiply, and you will enter and occupy the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors. Remember how the LORD your God led you through the wilderness for forty years, humbling you and testing you to prove your character, and to find out whether or not you would really obey his commands.” (Deuteronomy 8:1-2 NLT)
I can’t think of many tests that I’ve totally enjoyed taking. In school there were some tests that I was prepared for and didn’t have near the anxiety as other tests, but even when prepared there was always the thought that maybe I had missed something. God led the Israelites through the wilderness for forty years testing them the whole time. Seems unfair to the ones that had their hearts right, but still had to go through the testing. Today I am sixty years old, when I was twenty years old forty years seemed like a very long time. It seemed like eternity, a lifetime away. Today at sixty, I look back over the past forty years and realize that it wasn’t so long after all. The years that end on a zero seem to be milestones in my life. 0-10 was childhood and took forever. 10-20 I became an adult and it also seemed to go on endlessly. 20-30 I became independent and somewhat responsible for my own life, this time period went by quicker than I anticipated. 30-40 I went from realizing that I was not really young anymore, and wondered how I became old so quickly. 40-50 clipped along so quickly that I didn’t have time to do all I wanted, and even played catch-up most of the time. 50-60 just happened, I was fifty one day, turned around and I was sixty. A forty-year test is not as long as we might think it to be. As I look back over the last forty years I can see that I also have been in a test. Some of the important lessons that I have learned are that when I fail a test, I will have to take it again. I don’t care if it is in the natural, material or the spiritual realms, if I fail a test I find myself taking it again. I can look back over the past forty years and see where time and time again I was led into the wilderness for testing. As a result I grew, gained wisdom and knowledge, and had the experience to pass the test if needed to again. I don’t want to give you the idea that I was an A student. Many tests I just barely passed, but I learned. Today as I find myself several years into recovery, I know that I need to be truly grateful for my testing in the wilderness of life. Without the tests and having to swim upstream, I would have floated away just like a dead fish. Today I am learning to use each difficult occasion as an opportunity to allow God to demonstrate His power and love in my life. God is still doing for me what I could not do for myself…………..JRE
“God often uses the hard times in life to teach us important lessons. Here we see that he had a twofold purpose in Israel’s forty years of wandering. First, the trials were brought upon Israel to teach them humility. God wanted them to learn who they really were in relationship to him. Second, the trials were given to test the Israelites, so they could demonstrate what was really in their hearts. Sometimes God tests us in similar ways, pushing us to examine ourselves. We need to take advantage of the difficult times, using them as stepping-stones toward recovery.” The Life Recovery Bible, page 224
Trials and tests
Thought for the day: “True humility is not an abject, groveling, self-despising spirit. It is but a right estimate of ourselves as God sees us.” (Tryon Edwards)
“Be careful to obey all the commands I am giving you today. Then you will live and multiply, and you will enter and occupy the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors. Remember how the LORD your God led you through the wilderness for forty years, humbling you and testing you to prove your character, and to find out whether or not you would really obey his commands.” (Deuteronomy 8:1-2 NLT)
I can’t think of many tests that I’ve totally enjoyed taking. In school there were some tests that I was prepared for and didn’t have near the anxiety as other tests, but even when prepared there was always the thought that maybe I had missed something. God led the Israelites through the wilderness for forty years testing them the whole time. Seems unfair to the ones that had their hearts right, but still had to go through the testing. Today I am sixty years old, when I was twenty years old forty years seemed like a very long time. It seemed like eternity, a lifetime away. Today at sixty, I look back over the past forty years and realize that it wasn’t so long after all. The years that end on a zero seem to be milestones in my life. 0-10 was childhood and took forever. 10-20 I became an adult and it also seemed to go on endlessly. 20-30 I became independent and somewhat responsible for my own life, this time period went by quicker than I anticipated. 30-40 I went from realizing that I was not really young anymore, and wondered how I became old so quickly. 40-50 clipped along so quickly that I didn’t have time to do all I wanted, and even played catch-up most of the time. 50-60 just happened, I was fifty one day, turned around and I was sixty. A forty-year test is not as long as we might think it to be. As I look back over the last forty years I can see that I also have been in a test. Some of the important lessons that I have learned are that when I fail a test, I will have to take it again. I don’t care if it is in the natural, material or the spiritual realms, if I fail a test I find myself taking it again. I can look back over the past forty years and see where time and time again I was led into the wilderness for testing. As a result I grew, gained wisdom and knowledge, and had the experience to pass the test if needed to again. I don’t want to give you the idea that I was an A student. Many tests I just barely passed, but I learned. Today as I find myself several years into recovery, I know that I need to be truly grateful for my testing in the wilderness of life. Without the tests and having to swim upstream, I would have floated away just like a dead fish. Today I am learning to use each difficult occasion as an opportunity to allow God to demonstrate His power and love in my life. God is still doing for me what I could not do for myself…………..JRE
“God often uses the hard times in life to teach us important lessons. Here we see that he had a twofold purpose in Israel’s forty years of wandering. First, the trials were brought upon Israel to teach them humility. God wanted them to learn who they really were in relationship to him. Second, the trials were given to test the Israelites, so they could demonstrate what was really in their hearts. Sometimes God tests us in similar ways, pushing us to examine ourselves. We need to take advantage of the difficult times, using them as stepping-stones toward recovery.” The Life Recovery Bible, page 224
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Faith is not a once-done act, but a continuous gaze of the heart at the Triune God.” (A. W. Tozer)
“Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us, for I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:37-39
More than conquerors through Him that loved us. What an awesome thought, to be more than a conqueror. Not to just conquerors, but more than that because we can never be separated from the great love of God. I remember in Vietnam how we won the battles, and conquered the enemy, but when the politicians decided it was time to pull out we lost what we had conquered. Relations have been somewhat restored with Vietnam, but man it was tough for us veterans for many years having to live with the idea that our victory was taken away from us. Actually the main objective of the Vietnam War was to stop the spread of communism in South East Asia, and that was accomplished. Vietnam today is a country run by a bunch of old men who are no threat to any nation. Communism did not spread, but still in the minds of most Americans, what we had conquered was taken from us. We were not “more than conquerors.” Most victories can be lost if not maintained. I know that in my recovery from drugs and alcohol I must daily work on my spiritual condition, or I will become slack and lose the victory. But you know what? This scripture verse tells me that what Jesus accomplished on the cross is more than just a victory. The love that was a gift from God to each and every one of us can never be taken from us. Not by death, or any outside power, or anything that might happen in the future, or any creature and that includes man. What a promise! I know this is true because it has been tried and tested in my own life. I walked away from God on April 20, 1997 and did not look again to God for seventeen months. The instant I turned to God from a broken state of spirit, mind and body, I was consumed with God’s great love that had actually been there all along. Nothing had separated me from the love of God. God did for me what I could not do for myself. The Greek word that the apostle Paul used for “more than conquerors” is…. Hupernikao…. which is pronounced….. hoop-er-nik-ah'-o. I find this word to be unusual sounding but having such powerful meaning in the Scriptures. Thanks for letting me share…………………….JRE
“If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” (Author unknown)
hoop-er-nik-ah'-o
Thought for the day: “Faith is not a once-done act, but a continuous gaze of the heart at the Triune God.” (A. W. Tozer)
“Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us, for I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:37-39
More than conquerors through Him that loved us. What an awesome thought, to be more than a conqueror. Not to just conquerors, but more than that because we can never be separated from the great love of God. I remember in Vietnam how we won the battles, and conquered the enemy, but when the politicians decided it was time to pull out we lost what we had conquered. Relations have been somewhat restored with Vietnam, but man it was tough for us veterans for many years having to live with the idea that our victory was taken away from us. Actually the main objective of the Vietnam War was to stop the spread of communism in South East Asia, and that was accomplished. Vietnam today is a country run by a bunch of old men who are no threat to any nation. Communism did not spread, but still in the minds of most Americans, what we had conquered was taken from us. We were not “more than conquerors.” Most victories can be lost if not maintained. I know that in my recovery from drugs and alcohol I must daily work on my spiritual condition, or I will become slack and lose the victory. But you know what? This scripture verse tells me that what Jesus accomplished on the cross is more than just a victory. The love that was a gift from God to each and every one of us can never be taken from us. Not by death, or any outside power, or anything that might happen in the future, or any creature and that includes man. What a promise! I know this is true because it has been tried and tested in my own life. I walked away from God on April 20, 1997 and did not look again to God for seventeen months. The instant I turned to God from a broken state of spirit, mind and body, I was consumed with God’s great love that had actually been there all along. Nothing had separated me from the love of God. God did for me what I could not do for myself. The Greek word that the apostle Paul used for “more than conquerors” is…. Hupernikao…. which is pronounced….. hoop-er-nik-ah'-o. I find this word to be unusual sounding but having such powerful meaning in the Scriptures. Thanks for letting me share…………………….JRE
“If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” (Author unknown)
Monday, October 09, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joy, and dividing our grief.” JOSEPH ADDISON
“Roll your works upon the Lord, commit and trust them wholly to Him; [He will cause your thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and] so shall your plans be established and succeed.” (Proverbs 16:3, The Amplified Bible)
I like the way The Amplified Bible puts this scripture verse, “Roll your works upon the Lord.” The King James has it, “Commit thy works unto the Lord, and thy thoughts shall be established.” How difficult it is when we are going through a trying time to turn everything over to God. And when we use the word commit, it seems at times like we are going to pull something out of the mud, in order to release it. I’m not trying to change the value of the word commit in this scripture, it’s just that “roll your works upon” seems an easier way to get the ball rolling, so to speak. Probably the hardest part about committing to something is making the first move to become selfless enough to give to something other than ourselves. I like the idea of “rollin’ it over.” It’s not like we have to pick up this heavy load and carry it somewhere to get rid of it, we can ease it moving in the direction of God by rolling, and before we know it God is helping us with it. I think that in the process of turning our will and our life over to the care of God, the first change of heart that becomes willingness, will roll as if it were going down hill once started moving. I’ve often said that there was a thousand miles between God and I until I took the first step, and then God came the rest of the way. So it is when we roll our cares over to God. Once we start the rollin’ God helps with the rest of the job. It’s all a matter of the will. When we become born again, God leaves our will in tact. Our life choices are up to us. When we learn through experience to try and make our will line up with God’s will, we begin to see the advantage in having spiritual and supernatural help. I can’t do it on my own. I am so grateful that a loving God, full of grace and mercy, has been patient with me through out the years, and has shown me how to get the ball rollin’. God has done for me what I could not do for myself………………….JRE
“Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.” (Matthew 5:5)
“This Beatitude is among the half-dozen most important verses in the Bible. When you possess the spiritual meaning of this text you have the Secret of Dominion, the secret of overcoming every kind of difficulty. It is literally the Key of Life. It is the Jesus Christ Message reduced to a single sentence. This gnomic saying is actually the Philosopher’s Stone of the Alchemist that turns the base metal of limitations and trouble into the God of “comfort or true harmony.” EMMET FOX………………….The Sermon On The Mount, page 27
Get the ball rollin'
Thought for the day: “Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joy, and dividing our grief.” JOSEPH ADDISON
“Roll your works upon the Lord, commit and trust them wholly to Him; [He will cause your thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and] so shall your plans be established and succeed.” (Proverbs 16:3, The Amplified Bible)
I like the way The Amplified Bible puts this scripture verse, “Roll your works upon the Lord.” The King James has it, “Commit thy works unto the Lord, and thy thoughts shall be established.” How difficult it is when we are going through a trying time to turn everything over to God. And when we use the word commit, it seems at times like we are going to pull something out of the mud, in order to release it. I’m not trying to change the value of the word commit in this scripture, it’s just that “roll your works upon” seems an easier way to get the ball rolling, so to speak. Probably the hardest part about committing to something is making the first move to become selfless enough to give to something other than ourselves. I like the idea of “rollin’ it over.” It’s not like we have to pick up this heavy load and carry it somewhere to get rid of it, we can ease it moving in the direction of God by rolling, and before we know it God is helping us with it. I think that in the process of turning our will and our life over to the care of God, the first change of heart that becomes willingness, will roll as if it were going down hill once started moving. I’ve often said that there was a thousand miles between God and I until I took the first step, and then God came the rest of the way. So it is when we roll our cares over to God. Once we start the rollin’ God helps with the rest of the job. It’s all a matter of the will. When we become born again, God leaves our will in tact. Our life choices are up to us. When we learn through experience to try and make our will line up with God’s will, we begin to see the advantage in having spiritual and supernatural help. I can’t do it on my own. I am so grateful that a loving God, full of grace and mercy, has been patient with me through out the years, and has shown me how to get the ball rollin’. God has done for me what I could not do for myself………………….JRE
“Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.” (Matthew 5:5)
“This Beatitude is among the half-dozen most important verses in the Bible. When you possess the spiritual meaning of this text you have the Secret of Dominion, the secret of overcoming every kind of difficulty. It is literally the Key of Life. It is the Jesus Christ Message reduced to a single sentence. This gnomic saying is actually the Philosopher’s Stone of the Alchemist that turns the base metal of limitations and trouble into the God of “comfort or true harmony.” EMMET FOX………………….The Sermon On The Mount, page 27
Thursday, October 05, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, for anger resides in the bosom of fools.” (Ecclesiastes 7:9)
Anger is a luxury that some people can have, but not so with me. Anger is an emotion that is found in most all of us. It is not necessarily a bad emotion if it is kept under control and not allowed to become violence or rage. And I suppose that there is even a time when violence, such as self-defense is the proper thing to do. The apostle Paul wrote in the letter to the Ephesians, “Be angry and sin not, let not the sun go down on your wrath.” (Ephesians 4:26). So some anger must be justified, my problem is I don’t know when anger should be justified and when not. My own personal experience with anger is that it has always led me to problems. My recovery birthday is September 12, 1998. This date is very important to me, but just as important is the date of my last relapse, April 20, 1997. That is a day I do not want to forget, or forget why I relapsed. My journey this time in recovery started more than ten years ago in August of 1996. I had just turned fifty years old, was divorced and did not have much of anything going for me in any positive way. I was shooting Methamphetamine and staying up and awake for three to five days, then when I started coming down I would drink around a quart of whiskey for several days to level off. Then the whole thing would start over, up and down, around and around. I became so low emotionally and spiritually that death was starting to look up to me. I needed change if I wanted to survive. The first thing I did was check into the psych ward at the VA, and of course they recommended alcohol and drug treatment. For the sixth time in my life I committed myself to rehab. I once again started reading the Bible daily, going to church and was attending AA and NA meetings. Life was getting better each and every day. I was learning how to live life one day at a time putting God first. The longest I had ever been able to stay clean and sober in the past was a little over six months. This time I had passed the nine-month mark. Life was good, I was getting more involved with my church playing music, and was able to buy better equipment. I decided that I didn’t need as many AA and NA meetings because of my involvement with church. The church I was attending had arranged for a music evangelist to visit on Sunday April 21, 1997. I sat in the meeting that approved this visit. I kept some of my musical equipment at the church most of the time. I had a bass guitar and bass amp, electric guitar and amp, and an acoustic guitar at the church. The Saturday evening before the evangelist was to be there, I dropped by the church. To my surprise this man’s young boys had my musical equipment strung all over the platform. I went in and asked what was going on, and was told that as visitors at the church they could use any equipment they wanted. I said that was cool, but I was taking my stuff home. The father told me that if any of my equipment was damaged they would pay for it. With a festering attitude, I loaded up my stuff and went home. When I got home I checked everything out, and found my bass amp had been blown. I called the motel where this man and his boys were staying and told him of the damage. He denied it and refused to pay. I was angry. I thought I am not being treated right; after all I have done to stay clean and sober. I drove straight to the liquor store and bought a fifth. Next I went to my dealer’s house and scored a gram of methamphetamine. My intentions were to just do this once and get back to sobriety. Little did I know how powerful that first drink could be? It took me seventeen months of pure living hell to surrender once again and turn my will and life over to God. I learned a great lesson about anger in my life. I learned that I must turn it over quickly. And how do I turn it over? The only way I know, I have to forgive. Even when I have a right to be angry, I must forgive. There is only one letter difference between anger and danger. For me anger is danger. Once again on September 12, 1998, God did for me what I could not do for myself. Thanks for letting me share this……I needed to hear it again to stay grateful each day………………….JRE
“Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.” (Ephesians 4:25-27 NAS)
anger + D = danger
Thought for the day: “Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, for anger resides in the bosom of fools.” (Ecclesiastes 7:9)
Anger is a luxury that some people can have, but not so with me. Anger is an emotion that is found in most all of us. It is not necessarily a bad emotion if it is kept under control and not allowed to become violence or rage. And I suppose that there is even a time when violence, such as self-defense is the proper thing to do. The apostle Paul wrote in the letter to the Ephesians, “Be angry and sin not, let not the sun go down on your wrath.” (Ephesians 4:26). So some anger must be justified, my problem is I don’t know when anger should be justified and when not. My own personal experience with anger is that it has always led me to problems. My recovery birthday is September 12, 1998. This date is very important to me, but just as important is the date of my last relapse, April 20, 1997. That is a day I do not want to forget, or forget why I relapsed. My journey this time in recovery started more than ten years ago in August of 1996. I had just turned fifty years old, was divorced and did not have much of anything going for me in any positive way. I was shooting Methamphetamine and staying up and awake for three to five days, then when I started coming down I would drink around a quart of whiskey for several days to level off. Then the whole thing would start over, up and down, around and around. I became so low emotionally and spiritually that death was starting to look up to me. I needed change if I wanted to survive. The first thing I did was check into the psych ward at the VA, and of course they recommended alcohol and drug treatment. For the sixth time in my life I committed myself to rehab. I once again started reading the Bible daily, going to church and was attending AA and NA meetings. Life was getting better each and every day. I was learning how to live life one day at a time putting God first. The longest I had ever been able to stay clean and sober in the past was a little over six months. This time I had passed the nine-month mark. Life was good, I was getting more involved with my church playing music, and was able to buy better equipment. I decided that I didn’t need as many AA and NA meetings because of my involvement with church. The church I was attending had arranged for a music evangelist to visit on Sunday April 21, 1997. I sat in the meeting that approved this visit. I kept some of my musical equipment at the church most of the time. I had a bass guitar and bass amp, electric guitar and amp, and an acoustic guitar at the church. The Saturday evening before the evangelist was to be there, I dropped by the church. To my surprise this man’s young boys had my musical equipment strung all over the platform. I went in and asked what was going on, and was told that as visitors at the church they could use any equipment they wanted. I said that was cool, but I was taking my stuff home. The father told me that if any of my equipment was damaged they would pay for it. With a festering attitude, I loaded up my stuff and went home. When I got home I checked everything out, and found my bass amp had been blown. I called the motel where this man and his boys were staying and told him of the damage. He denied it and refused to pay. I was angry. I thought I am not being treated right; after all I have done to stay clean and sober. I drove straight to the liquor store and bought a fifth. Next I went to my dealer’s house and scored a gram of methamphetamine. My intentions were to just do this once and get back to sobriety. Little did I know how powerful that first drink could be? It took me seventeen months of pure living hell to surrender once again and turn my will and life over to God. I learned a great lesson about anger in my life. I learned that I must turn it over quickly. And how do I turn it over? The only way I know, I have to forgive. Even when I have a right to be angry, I must forgive. There is only one letter difference between anger and danger. For me anger is danger. Once again on September 12, 1998, God did for me what I could not do for myself. Thanks for letting me share this……I needed to hear it again to stay grateful each day………………….JRE
“Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.” (Ephesians 4:25-27 NAS)
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “We must give freely and gratefully that which has been freely and gratefully given to us.” (Narcotics Anonymous, Basic Text, page 47)
Peter replied, “Each of you must turn from your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This promise is to you and to your children, and even to the Gentiles, all who have been called by the Lord our God.”…………………..A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles preformed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together constantly and shared everything they had.
Acts 2:38-39, 43-44 The New Living Translation
What a difference a few days can make. Just seven weeks prior to Peter making this speech he had denied even knowing Jesus. At that time Peter was running on his own steam and self-will and his spiritual energy was running low. When Peter denied knowing Jesus it was in the middle of the night and he had been up all day. He was tired. Too tired. In recovery we have a word we use as a way of taking our spiritual temperature, the word is HALT. Never let your self get too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, or too Tired. Peter was all alone, had a bad attitude, and was tired. He had three of the four warnings for relapse working against him. And he did relapse spiritually. So why did Peter seven weeks later speak with such boldness? Why the change in such a short time? The answer can be found in knowing what powered him. Peter had truly become a different person empowered with the Holy Spirit. Not of his own power, but a Power greater than himself. The last words that Jesus spoke to the disciples were, “But when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, you will receive power and will tell people about me everywhere.” (Acts 1:8) We all need a Power greater than ourselves to help us make it each day. Oh we can struggle along and get by on our own power, but I prefer to have the extra horsepower in my spiritual drive train. I tried for years to overcome my alcoholism and drug addictions on my own. I honestly did not want to use at times, and attempted on my own many times to stay clean and sober. It seems like I ran out of power every time. At a weak point, temptation would beckon, and I, being powerless would submit. Today I am so grateful for a Power greater than myself to get me up and over the hump of temptation. If I daily feed my spiritual life on the Word of God and service to others, I don’t run out of steam when there is some hill to climb in my life. And you know what? This Power is a gift. Peter said clearly that it was promised to us who will receive it. “This promise is to you and to your children, and even to the Gentiles, all who have been called by the Lord our God.” When I realized that I could find myself in that sentence, I received the gift. In doing so, God was able to do for me what I could not do for myself…………..JRE
“Peters preaching led the people to examine their lives, and they readily recognized their need for salvation in Christ. Peter assured them that by turning from their sins and entrusting their lives to God, they would be forgiven and receive gift of the Holy Spirit. We can expect the same blessings if we bring our sins before God. His forgiveness will set us free from bondage to our sins of the past. The presence of the Holy Spirit will give us the power to preserve through hard times. If God is in our life, he will lead us to successful recovery.” (Life Recovery Bible, page 1297)
AA Step Two: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 60)
Extra horsepower in my spiritual drive train
Thought for the day: “We must give freely and gratefully that which has been freely and gratefully given to us.” (Narcotics Anonymous, Basic Text, page 47)
Peter replied, “Each of you must turn from your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This promise is to you and to your children, and even to the Gentiles, all who have been called by the Lord our God.”…………………..A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles preformed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together constantly and shared everything they had.
Acts 2:38-39, 43-44 The New Living Translation
What a difference a few days can make. Just seven weeks prior to Peter making this speech he had denied even knowing Jesus. At that time Peter was running on his own steam and self-will and his spiritual energy was running low. When Peter denied knowing Jesus it was in the middle of the night and he had been up all day. He was tired. Too tired. In recovery we have a word we use as a way of taking our spiritual temperature, the word is HALT. Never let your self get too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, or too Tired. Peter was all alone, had a bad attitude, and was tired. He had three of the four warnings for relapse working against him. And he did relapse spiritually. So why did Peter seven weeks later speak with such boldness? Why the change in such a short time? The answer can be found in knowing what powered him. Peter had truly become a different person empowered with the Holy Spirit. Not of his own power, but a Power greater than himself. The last words that Jesus spoke to the disciples were, “But when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, you will receive power and will tell people about me everywhere.” (Acts 1:8) We all need a Power greater than ourselves to help us make it each day. Oh we can struggle along and get by on our own power, but I prefer to have the extra horsepower in my spiritual drive train. I tried for years to overcome my alcoholism and drug addictions on my own. I honestly did not want to use at times, and attempted on my own many times to stay clean and sober. It seems like I ran out of power every time. At a weak point, temptation would beckon, and I, being powerless would submit. Today I am so grateful for a Power greater than myself to get me up and over the hump of temptation. If I daily feed my spiritual life on the Word of God and service to others, I don’t run out of steam when there is some hill to climb in my life. And you know what? This Power is a gift. Peter said clearly that it was promised to us who will receive it. “This promise is to you and to your children, and even to the Gentiles, all who have been called by the Lord our God.” When I realized that I could find myself in that sentence, I received the gift. In doing so, God was able to do for me what I could not do for myself…………..JRE
“Peters preaching led the people to examine their lives, and they readily recognized their need for salvation in Christ. Peter assured them that by turning from their sins and entrusting their lives to God, they would be forgiven and receive gift of the Holy Spirit. We can expect the same blessings if we bring our sins before God. His forgiveness will set us free from bondage to our sins of the past. The presence of the Holy Spirit will give us the power to preserve through hard times. If God is in our life, he will lead us to successful recovery.” (Life Recovery Bible, page 1297)
AA Step Two: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 60)
Monday, October 02, 2006
jralphengland@yahoo.com
Thought for the day: “Happy is the man who has broken the chains which hurt the mind, and has given up worrying once and for all.” OVID
“Aaron will present the bull as a sin offering, to make atonement for himself and his family. Then he must bring the two male goats and present them to the LORD at the entrance of the Tabernacle. He is to cast sacred lots to determine which goat will be sacrificed to the LORD and which will be the scapegoat. The goat chosen to be sacrificed to the LORD will be presented by Aaron as a sin offering. The goat chosen to be the scapegoat will be presented to the LORD alive. When it is sent away into the wilderness, it will make atonement for the people.” (Leviticus 16:6-10 NLT)
Today is Yom Kippur, the Jewish observance of their time of atonement. This is a day that was set-aside yearly for the priest to take the blood of a goat and sprinkle it behind the veil in an area of the Tabernacle known as the Holy of Holies. The high priest could only enter this place once a year and it was done for the atonement of the sins of the nation of Israel. Exactly what does the word atone mean? Webster defines it as “become reconciled; to make amends or reparation for wrongdoing; to bring into agreement.” The Day of Atonement reconciled the people back to God with the forgiveness of their sins. Yom Kippur is a time of self-examination when the people reflected over the past year and became aware of their shortcomings. In AA it is similar to doing a fourth step inventory when we closely examine our lives and write it down on paper. I saw the word atonement written the other day as At-One-Ment, or meaning that we are at one with God, and that is exactly what is meant. There were two goats that were used. Lots were cast, sort of like rolling dice, and one was chosen to pay the price, and the other was set free. This was called the scapegoat or the goat that escaped. That goat carried away the sins and guilt of the people. I was set free to live again when Jesus took the part of the scapegoat and carried away my sins. Jesus also was the goat that was sacrificed; His blood was shed as atonement for my sins. The Book of Hebrews says that Jesus our High Priest did it once and for all, never needing to be done again on a yearly basis as it was done before. As I read the Old Testament I am learning to see Jesus in all of the rituals and traditions that the nation of Israel observed. On the Day of Atonement the people’s sins were forgiven, and today I also must make atonement to those who have sinned against me. I must forgive. Being set free totally depends upon my forgiving others, and making amends to those I have harmed. Today I am grateful for the scapegoat, and that I did not get what I deserved. God has done for me what I could not do for myself……………..JRE
A.A. Step Eight: “Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.” Alcoholics Anonymous page 60
“Some of the people we have hurt will use us as their scapegoat. Since we have hurt them, they feel justified in sending us away with more than our share of the burden. They unconsciously place the blame for their pain on us so we can carry it away. As their scapegoats, we play the role of removing something they were unable to deal with in any other way. Because of this, they may never welcome us back. We should be prepared for this kind of response and realize that their behavior says more about them than it says about us. Life Recovery Bible, page 147
Yom Kippur
Thought for the day: “Happy is the man who has broken the chains which hurt the mind, and has given up worrying once and for all.” OVID
“Aaron will present the bull as a sin offering, to make atonement for himself and his family. Then he must bring the two male goats and present them to the LORD at the entrance of the Tabernacle. He is to cast sacred lots to determine which goat will be sacrificed to the LORD and which will be the scapegoat. The goat chosen to be sacrificed to the LORD will be presented by Aaron as a sin offering. The goat chosen to be the scapegoat will be presented to the LORD alive. When it is sent away into the wilderness, it will make atonement for the people.” (Leviticus 16:6-10 NLT)
Today is Yom Kippur, the Jewish observance of their time of atonement. This is a day that was set-aside yearly for the priest to take the blood of a goat and sprinkle it behind the veil in an area of the Tabernacle known as the Holy of Holies. The high priest could only enter this place once a year and it was done for the atonement of the sins of the nation of Israel. Exactly what does the word atone mean? Webster defines it as “become reconciled; to make amends or reparation for wrongdoing; to bring into agreement.” The Day of Atonement reconciled the people back to God with the forgiveness of their sins. Yom Kippur is a time of self-examination when the people reflected over the past year and became aware of their shortcomings. In AA it is similar to doing a fourth step inventory when we closely examine our lives and write it down on paper. I saw the word atonement written the other day as At-One-Ment, or meaning that we are at one with God, and that is exactly what is meant. There were two goats that were used. Lots were cast, sort of like rolling dice, and one was chosen to pay the price, and the other was set free. This was called the scapegoat or the goat that escaped. That goat carried away the sins and guilt of the people. I was set free to live again when Jesus took the part of the scapegoat and carried away my sins. Jesus also was the goat that was sacrificed; His blood was shed as atonement for my sins. The Book of Hebrews says that Jesus our High Priest did it once and for all, never needing to be done again on a yearly basis as it was done before. As I read the Old Testament I am learning to see Jesus in all of the rituals and traditions that the nation of Israel observed. On the Day of Atonement the people’s sins were forgiven, and today I also must make atonement to those who have sinned against me. I must forgive. Being set free totally depends upon my forgiving others, and making amends to those I have harmed. Today I am grateful for the scapegoat, and that I did not get what I deserved. God has done for me what I could not do for myself……………..JRE
A.A. Step Eight: “Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.” Alcoholics Anonymous page 60
“Some of the people we have hurt will use us as their scapegoat. Since we have hurt them, they feel justified in sending us away with more than our share of the burden. They unconsciously place the blame for their pain on us so we can carry it away. As their scapegoats, we play the role of removing something they were unable to deal with in any other way. Because of this, they may never welcome us back. We should be prepared for this kind of response and realize that their behavior says more about them than it says about us. Life Recovery Bible, page 147
